me and my sister got really close this past summer. we were learning how to be apart (parents divorced and we split & went one with each). it was really nice. we started doing anything and nothing together. we talked everyday and we became best friends. it was nice having someone i could always count on. we bonded over the silliest things and it worked for us. about a month ago we had a huge fight. it was sort of ridiculous and stupid but it happened. we both tend to be a bit stubborn and mean when we want to be. the reason i think we got so mad is because we didn't like how the other was reacting. i'm emotional, and she is not. it's just how we are. so we went weeks without speaking. let me just tell you now that it was some of the most lonely weeks of my life. i didn't talk to her everyday and it was weird. but i always found things that i wanted to tell her, but i couldn't cave first (there's that stubborness). so i let us grow apart and that bonding slowly faded. now we are talking again and it just feels weird. i feel like i am talking to a friend that i haven't seen in years. i feel like i can't be myself because i don't want to cause another fight. this isn't how sisters should be, right? we should be laughing and enjoying our lives together. but we're not because of a stupid fight that shouldn't of been such a big deal. i wish we could go back to how we were...
i miss talking everyday about our boyband obsession and how one of us (not me) has a crush on their teacher. i miss going to get starbucks together. i miss getting a cupcake to go along with our starbucks. i miss talking about how she will go off to college in a year when i can remember her as a kindergartner. i just miss all of it. i'm sure we will get back there someday when we're older and realize all these petty fights were just that.
i'm not sure if she will ever read this. or if i will ever tell her that i posted about her. but i do know she was the first person i told that i made a blog because i knew she would understand. i know she is a wonderful and strong, independent girl who will change the world. i know that no matter what happens that i love her more than anything and i will do anything for her. i know that this summer i will celebrate us seeing our loves in concert and act like 12 year old girls. i know we won't care about anyone who judges how we are, because we are sisters. i know that even if we fight that our tattoos will always be a reminder of our bonds. nothing can change the fact that she is my sister. and she always will be.
Hebrews 6:19 states we have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.
do you have a sister? are you talking? are you friends? if not make it right. one day all you will have is your sister. she will be everything to you.
“Sister. She is your mirror, shining back at you with a world of possibilities. She is your witness, who sees you at your worst and best, and loves you anyway. She is your partner in crime, your midnight companion, someone who knows when you are smiling, even in the dark. She is your teacher, your defense attorney, your personal press agent, even your shrink. Some days, she's the reason you wish you were an only child.” --Barbara Alpert
xoxo
-Sam
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